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News: Tom Morello stars in Guitar Hero III
Activision has announced that Tom Morello, from Rage Against the Machine and Audioslave, will guest star as a boss character in Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock. Click here to read the article.
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Celebrity Deathmatch
What do you get when you cross an old license with a talent-less game studio? You guessed it, Celebrity Deathmatch. For those who don't know, Celebrity Deathmatch was a popular show on MTV a few years ago. It was basically claymated (animated with clay) celebrities beating the life out of each other using over the top moves that resulted in a bloody ending. The show was then cancelled and that was the end of that. Or so you would think. Unfortunately for us, there is now a video game based on Celebrity Deathmatch.
At first thought you might say to yourself, "Hmm, fighting celebrities and extreme violence… this might be good!" Sorry to burst your bubble, this game is complete crap. One of the worst games ever made, and I'm not exaggerating.
Not even celebrities such as Carmen Electra, Mr. T., and Marilyn Manson make this game mildly enjoying. I honestly don't know how all the celebrities in this game agreed to do this project. In case you are wondering, the following celebrities are playable: Busta Rhymes, Marilyn Manson, Carrot Top, Jerry Springer, Carmen Electra, Dennis Rodman, Anna Nicole Smith, Mr. T, Ron Jeremy, Miss Cleo, Cindy Margolis, Shannen Doherty, Tommy Lee, and N'Sync… all five of them.
Gameplay is very limited in Celebrity Deathmatch. Sure each celebrity has a special move, but a special move is nothing without a solid fighting engine backing it up. This game will have you punching and kicking, punching and kicking, and (wait for it) punching and kicking. The same moves over and over and over again. I almost threw my controller at my TV in frustration. Come to think about it, I am becoming frustrated writing this damn review. Shame on you Celebrity Deathmatch, shame on you!
Visually, Celebrity Deathmatch looks like an early PS2 game. Animation is bland and badly done. Detail is scarce and the characters don't even look like clay! What's up with that? Needless to say, this game won't be up for any visual awards… well, except one: Worst Graphics in a Fighting Game.
As far as audio goes, it is no improvement over the graphics. Voice acting is not done by the actual celebrities, rather by some generic voice "actors." Commentary is the only somewhat amusing part of the game. The hosts, Johnny Gomez and Nick Diamond provide some funny jokes but unfortunately they get old really quick seeing as they repeat them over and over again.
I leave you with some advice: Do not, under any circumstance, buy this game. If you see it at your local store, quickly look away and purchase the nearest copy of Halo… or ANY other Xbox game besides this pile of garbage. Celebrity Deathmatch will set you back $10 tops, but even then, it's $10 too much.
Report Card:
Gameplay = 2
Graphics = 3
Audio = 2
Replay Value = 0
Overall: 2/10
Click here for the Celebrity Deathmatch gallery!
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